In previous posts, we’ve discussed monkey burgers, koeksisters, biltong and several other different foods we’ve encountered in South Africa thus far. Well, if the sticker on the inside of our new freezer is any indication, we’ve only seen the tip of the iceberg. (Yes, the pun was by all means intended.)

Unlike our clothes dryer, which lists instructions for use in German, Spanish, French, Dutch, Danish, Swedish, Portuguese, English and Italian across the top of the unit, the freezer opts for little symbols. The intent is to show which coldness settings should be used for particular foods. However, some of the symbols are more obvious than others, leaving a few open to interpretation. Here’s the sticker, with my analysis to follow:

OK, here’s the way I see it:

• Setting 1-2 is for casseroles, ice cream and vintage stocking caps
• Setting 3-4 is for fish, crabs wearing tiny boxing gloves and raisin bread
• Setting 5-6 is for cheese (really? in the freezer?), prosthetic hooks and UPS packages
• Setting 7-8 is for sheep, pizza and bath toys
• Setting 9-10 is for chicken (or weird bananas), vegetables and bunnies
• Setting 11-12 is for deer, fruit and dinosaur meat

Now, you may say, “Dinosaur meat? Don’t be daft!”

To which I would say, “Check it.”

I’m pretty sure what I see here, what we all see here, is a dinosaur. Perhaps a Brontosaurus, I’m not sure. It’s been a while since I’ve seen a full episode of the Flintstones.

I don’t know how dinosaur meat comes, I haven’t seen it at Spar or Pick n Pay or the Housewives Market or any of the other grocery stores we frequent. I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t fit in our tiny freezer, anyway.

Stupid sticker…